Thursday, April 30, 2020

Self Care And Self Aware

     Let's get this thing started tonight. Once again, despite all the bad things that are going on, I'm having a real good day. Mentally speaking anyway. I feel good, and that has me even thinking I look good. I'm not going out and saying I'm a model or anything like that, but for a 49 year old man with all kinds of issues, I think I look pretty good. That being said, I took pictures. Yeah, I know it's a few days ahead of schedule, but what the heck. It's a good day so lets have some fun. The first one is what I decided to make my Facebook avatar, but once it went up, I decided I need to change it. Let's go in order, and I'll explain after.




















     This one was done for the sake of art, and then I once I saw it on the profile, I had to make it darker by going black and white. I think it worked, since a family member told me it was disturbing. I did add a disturbing caption, but that was all part of the fun. The color photo was part of an instagram post talking about how much I'm liking me right now. That was the second photo, the first one was this one.


     The whole idea behind these is that self care has gotten me to a much better place despite my current situation. No matter how bad things get, I will always have me, and I better start loving the me that I am, and I can now truly say, that I'm beginning to love that person. If you re wondering if I'm wearing eyeliner, I am, as well as eye shadow. Oddly enough, I have found that I feel much better when I do my eyes up. I'm nowhere near any good at it, yet, but I'll get there, and I may even go more bold. No, this isn't desire to be female, it's just a very different way of expressing myself, and not caring what anyone things about it. I've found the in order to be successful at self care, you have to be a little selfish, and put more focus on yourself. That's what I'm doing, and that leads to the ideals of not caring what anyone else thinks about me or my appearance. I have to live with it, and i'm pretty darn happy with it, and that's all that matters.

     Ok, on to more self serving shots. I'm a little over a week and a half back on full time keto, and that could also be a reason that I'm feeling so good. Long gone is the carb bloat, and feelings of aggravation. Yeah I didn't tell you about that. I was highly volatile on carbs. everything was getting to me. The smallest sound would cause a rage in my head. That is gone. It is also a lesson learned from all of this. Even though I was very aware of that rage going on, I didn't attribute it to my diet, I just chalked it up to all the stressful things going on in my life. I can see now that it was clearly the diet.

     Now for the body shots. I took a few photos just to show you what my body is looking like right now going from carbs to keto. I don't think it looks much different, but to my eyes, there is a huge difference. Here they are.




















     Ok, that is the last side profile clothed photo vs, the one I took today. Not much of a difference in a appearance there, and I wanted to start you with that, cause they aren't as revolting as the shirt off shots. Get ready for those now.



























     There you have it. The last one was of course the obnoxious overindulgent shot. I still have those sore areas that I have to work; back, chest, legs, legs, legs. Yeah, I've decided that when I can get back into a gym the legs are going to be hit really hard, but with new knowledge. That's right, I've been doing a ton of research on different ways to hit the legs without weight, so I'm definitely going to transfer that over to using weight. I'll hit those weak areas, and extenuate the stronger areas, that just grow, grow, grow. Which reminds me, I did weigh in today, which is only a day early, but I was curious since I've been feeling really lean and just overall better. I was a little shocked when I stood on the scale. I always do it first thing in the morning, so it's the "true" weight. If you remember, my final carb weight was 154.4 lbs. I quickly went down to 151.2, when I first went back into keto. I weighed in this morning at 153.8 lbs. I was blown away. I was expecting with the way I was feeling that I would be in the high 140's, but that was not to be. I checked my body fat measurement, and it was a slight tick lower. I'm still calling it at 15%, but it did move in the lower percentage direction. That could be just the pinch of skin I got or maybe less water retention in my skin, so I'm not holding it as a fat loss, but the fact that it did move, and my weight is much higher then I expected it to be, I'm seeing it as a glowing success. I'm still holding off final reading of the measurements until after 30 days, so I can see if the carb affect boosted me into something, but it is interesting reading the numbers right now.

     Time for garden news. Before we get into the backyard produce. I got a show you the little friend I found out there today.


      This little dude, that wasn't so little was hanging out on the fire pit after the rains stopped today. Oh yeah, we got a good bit of rain today, which I'm hoping is going to make the garden explode with new growth.

     Now onto the good stuff. I harvested a few peppers this morning so I could eat some for dinner and have them ready for the pizza tomorrow. Here is the morning peppers I picked.


     The orange is the Bulgarian Carrot, which I'm not all that found of. The 4 red ones are the Aji Colorado, with the Sugar Rush Peach right in the middle of them, and the small stubby yellow one is a Lemon Spice Jalapeño. So far those are all runts, but it did taste good. I had it in my dinner tonight.

     The afternoon peppers are another Lemon Spice that I missed in the morning, and a Jalapeño Chernobyl.


     Believe it of not, that chernobyl is a runt as well. It's just nuder 6 inches long, and it is said to get up to a foot long. It looked real funny on the plant. It was half the size of the plant itself. I have no idea how that plant held that monster on there and not fall over. It did only produce the one pepper so far, and I have no idea how it tastes. The description says that it's mild heat, so I won't get that heat rush from it, but they also say that it has good flavor. I think I'm going to make it into a giant bacon wrapped popper, and throw that Lemon Spice in with the cheese. I'll do that tomorrow as a tittle side dish with the pizza. I'm really hoping that it's really good.

     I did get to try a new pepper that was really good, and that was the Purple UFO. It had a nice cotton candy type of sweetness. Not CC flavor, but that burst of sweetness that you are hit when you have CC, then almost immediately, you are hit with the heat. It's not as strong as Habanero, but it packs a little punch. It is a tongue attacker, and it goes for some time. Oh, the picture.


      As you an see, it's not Purple, but that is only when it's ripe. It gets it's name from the fact that the pods are purple almost the entire time they are growing. They only go red when they ripen. I still need to try a purple one to see how the flavor is different. I tried a unripe Scarlet Chili today, and it didn't have much flavor at all, but had an aftertaste that was almost like cantaloupe. It was a bit weird. It will be interesting to see what the UFO tastes like before it's ripe. I'm going to go get one as soon as I'm done writing this. I'll let you know how it is on Sunday.

     I will leave you with one last shot of the garden. I did use up all the soil I bought and got the bags filled that my buddy gave me, but I still have so much more that needs to go to a bigger home. I did manage to take care of all the small pots that were grossly overdue for a new home, so just about everything that needs to be in a gallon pot or larger are in them. Next month I'll get some more soil and get back at it. This picture is of the garden right outside the door, and I love this shot, not because you can see how the garden is looking now, but Morty and Baby Girl were able to get in the shot as well. Peace in and goodnight.



Tuesday, April 28, 2020

Can Gardening Wake Me Up

     I'm tired. The last week has me completely exhausted. I haven't woken up before 5:30 in about a week. I know that still sounds early, but I like to wake up around 4 or 4:30, and get a lot of my cardio and meditation and other self care things done early, and when I wake up at 6, I can't get it all done. There is also the fact that those early morning hours are incredibly peaceful so I really enjoy that time alone. This could be my body telling me that it's worn down, but I don't have that normal rundown feeling. It's weird.

     I just saw a report, that leads me to believe even more that my illness in February, was Covid-19. It had to do with an association with rashes. In the final days of having high fevers and chills, I developed a very bad measles like rash on my back and, well basically my entire torso. It sucked, and I didn't really think much of it, until today when I saw that news report. They are finally opening a testing center near by, but I don't know if they have antibody testing, which is the only test that would tell me if I did have it, and the one place that is doing it, is charging $100 for the test. I think that is ridiculous considering that if I test positive for antibodies, I can donate plasma to help save other peoples lives, and I would think that government on, at the state level at the very least would want that. It would also benefit friends of mine, that are the source of my illness. It would ease their minds a little. Saying that, don't get me wrong, there is no proof that if you had the virus, that you will not get it again. There is no proof of immunity as of yet. Even though I believe that I may have had it, I'm treating it as if I either have it, or haven't had it yet. That keeps everyone safe.

     I'm seeing more and more people failing to do just the bare minimum to save other people from this virus, and I do believe that things are going to ramp back up again soon. It sucks, because I've been isolated since February. I was doing it long before other people because I did get sick and I didn't want anyone else to catch what ever it was I had. The good news on that is, that I didn't get anyone else sick. I did my part then, and I continue to do so. Since I still consider myself at risk, it's all up to other people to do their part to keep me safe, and they just aren't doing it.

     Oh, I got some fun pictures. I got my shipment from Butcher Box today, and it came early. That means that the dry ice they pack it in was rather large. I got a bucket full of water and had a little morning fun.





















     I only wish it came with a large block in the evening, so I could play around with some lights. Maybe even get some cool shots with the Canon. I did shoot some cool slow motion videos of it, but I'm not going to bother sharing them, since the last video I tried to post, never uploaded on here. Yes I did disinfect everything before putting it away in the freezer. I'm living that sterile life yo.

     I did get to do one really enjoyable thing today. I picked up soil. I know, that doesn't sound all that enjoyable, but when you like gardening as much as I do, that's pretty exciting. My local nursery changed things around to up the safety level. They have an online store, where you order what you want, and then you schedule when you want to pick it up. They have their parking lot marked out to slots, and they email you the slot your stuff is in, and you drive up and just load it in the car. I didn't have to walk around, or get a cart to carry everything, I just popped the trunk and then away I went. Tomorrow is going to be some serious planting day.


     I'm sure I mentioned how much I love that wagon, but I'm going to do it again. I love that wagon. I'm sure I need more soil than that, and I would normally have a couple of bags of manure to stretch it out, but I'm not making two trips to get things together, so the soil will do. This is really good soil though, and the manure isn't necessary, I just use dit as filler.

     That's about all I have for tonight, with the exception of Favorite Song of the Week. This is one that I was reminded of from and Instagram story of a friend of mine. It's an old song (1996) and the band hasn't made and album since 2002. This whole album was phenomenal. I'm only going to share their hit with you tonight, but I implore you to look up the album Becoming X by the Sneaker Pimps. Here is this weeks Favorite Song of the Week. Sneaker Pimps, with "6 Underground".


     Their sound was so smooth and funky, and put me in a good place despite being tired. Peace in and goodnight.

Sunday, April 26, 2020

The Beauty Of Gardening

     I'm going to go a little against the grain tonight, and discus
s the beauty of growing your own food. I've talked about this a little in the past, but It was only little tastes of it, and frankly, I don't really have anything to talk about tonight, so let's go.

     First up is one you've already seen, and that is the Scarlet Chili. I knew it was going to go from a deep eggplant purple to red, but I had no idea that the transition was as colorful as it is. It's truly striking and a bit psychedelic.


    That's pretty cool right? Anyway, I have a few peppers tonight and that might be the most striking of all of them. The next is a unique Scotch Bonnet, that is repining a bit differently than I have seen before. Generally, it will ripen from top to bottom, and go from green to yellow, and then it will slowly darken all over to a yellow/orange. This one went a different route, and seems to be doing everything at one time.


     The dark spots are just dirt, nothing to worry about. Right now, it has fully made the transition to it's yellow/orange color and is ready to be eaten, but I'm going to hold off until more are ripe. The second one began ripening today, and it is back to the old school way of making that transition. Have I mentioned that I love the flavor of the Scotch Bonnet? I believe I have.

     Next up is a pepper that I haven't tried yet, but I will soon. This picture was taken during the ripening process, and I'm not sure if it's ready to pick yet. Pictures of ripe ones, have it a solid bright red, and this is still a shade of dark crimson with the purple still bleeding through. This is the Purple UFO, and it's supposed to have some really good heat involved in it. I've been told habanero level, and possible higher, so this one should be really good.


     I know I've shown you the fist pepper before, but here are a bunch of them in all their glory. They were created to have an unripe white color so that they would blend into chowders, but they are pretty good when they are fully ripe and red. Quite honestly, I've never tried them in their unripe state, so I don't know what the flavor is like. I picked these this morning so that they could go in dinner tonight. That will be the back to normal portion of this. I got pictures of dinner and I want to share. Anyway, this is the fish pepper.


     You can see a little of the variegation in the peppers, and the stems. It's such a unique and cool plant. I just wish the peppers were a little hotter. They have been hit and miss. Only 1 out of those 4 had some heat to it. These were drastically undersize too, so that could be playing into it. I have some larger ones ripening up right now, so we will see.

     Next on the list is the last photo of the garden for you. This is the Ise pepper, and the Sunrise Bumblebee tomatoes. The Ise is actually labeled as a sweet pepper that is mild, which had me wondering since all these other medium heats were coming up mild, this one might just surprise me the other way and be hot, but it wasn't. The flavor was intense, and tasted like a fruit punch that was leaning towards grape. The flavor lingered a lot longer than most other pepper as well. I really liked this pepper, and it goes to the top of my list of best tasting peppers. The Sunrise Bumblebees are really the second set of tomatoes to ripen on the plant. The first set were eaten by Morty. He loves tomatoes especially when he is not supposed to eat them. They aren't just pretty, but they have the flavor to match. This is one of those tomatoes that you an eat right off the plant. The flavor has this nice zing to it, and light citrus notes in it, with a hint of tomatoey goodness. If you ever have a change to try these or grow them, I hight suggest that you do. You will not be disappointed. They went on the top of tonights dinner, which is still coming up.


     How great do those look? Oh, I plan on getting some vanilla ice cream (keto friendly of course0 tomorrow and I'm cutting up that Ise, and an El Rito which has a really sweet and fruity flavor as well, and putting it in the ice cream, I just get this feeling that it's going to be really good. I'll take pictures and let you know for Tuesday night.

     Time for dinner. I still have a lot of vegan meat substitutes, that I've been working on getting rid of, so tonight was a vegan dinner night. It was Gardein, ground beef, and Italian sausage, with riced cauliflower, fish peppers, and spinach, and topped with those Sunrise Bumblebees. Despite the fact that it was loaded with all kinds of anti-nutrients, it was really tasty with those tomatoes being the best part. 


     Once I get rid of all that Gardein, I will not get it again. It is loaded with soy, which is ok if you have it occasionally, which is how I eat it. There is also the fact that soy farming destroys the land and biosystems for years. You see, soy is an annual, which farmers have to abandon those fields and expand to new area each year. What is left behind is basically a disaster area that nothing will grow for years, unless they treat the soil, which isn't cost affective for them, so they expand, chop down forests and destroy ecosystems. I'm sure I will get some people saying that it isn't true, but it is. Just like factory farming of cattle, which I am highly agains, farming farming of produce also wrecks the planet. Once again, there is also the fact that soy isn't really all that good for you, in large amounts. 

     Ok, it sounds like I'm getting to political, and I wanted this to be a joy of plants and the beauty that they have. Peace in and goodnight.

Thursday, April 23, 2020

I'm Getting My Heat Tolerance Back

     Just a quick observation before we get started. If this country doesn't come out of this virus healthier overall, you all wasted your money on the gym and gardening equipment that I want. I've been looking for kettlebells, and they are either sold out, or way over priced at this time. I'm only looking for a 50 lbs kettlebell, that should be anywhere from $60-$90. The only ones I can find are over $200. That is just ridiculous. I'm also looking for grow bags, they are sold out everywhere, and not scheduled back in stock until the middle of next month. So, what I'm saying, is you all bought all the fitness gear and growing gear, so you better be using it.

     It's going to rain here for the next two days, so my garden is going to be doing amazing afterwards. That's what always seems to happen. No matter how much I water on a daily basis, it just doesn't compare to a good rainy day. My plants tend to double in size in some cases, and it's so exciting to watch them grow. I have a bunch of peppers that are ripening, but most of them are mild, and I need to get my heat game back up. The illness that I had ruined my tolerance level. I did eat a few peppers today trying them out for the first time, or renewing my memory of one of them.


     Those are more fish peppers and a few of the Colorado. If you remember, those Colorado are grown from seeds from a pod that my buddy gave me, so the cycle is now complete, and it was so good. I ate the two smallest of them, just to get the flavor and test the heat. Both brought a little heat. I'm saving the bigger ones for pizza Friday. I do love a good spicy kick to my pizzas. I do have to put them only on half the pizza, so I can get my moms slices without them. I tell her that they are on there though, so she thinks she is getting the heat. Her heat level is very low now, and she can't even stomach a jalapeño, so I play pretend with her, and she gets real proud of herself and how she can handle hot peppers.

     Oh, I do have a picture of two different Scarlet chilis, because there are so cool looking. I just ate a second one a few minutes ago. I needed to go outside to check on the plants while I was writing this. They are supposed to have medium heat, but so far they have had none. They are a really nice fruity flavor though, so that is a plus.



















     Seriously though, aren't those cool looking. That striping is because of the variegation in the leaves and calyx. It flows all the way down into the pepper. You can kind of see it on the pepper on the right. Look at where the pepper attaches to the stem, and you can see some white up there. That is the variegation. It's a neat little defect in the plant. It doesn't ruin it in any way, it just makes the whole plant look really cool. I know you saw the fish pepper plant with it's green and white leaves. This one has leaves that go from green to red to purple. You can kind of see that in the same picture as well. Real pretty plant.

     I can't tell you how much better I've felt physically over the past few days, being full-time keto again. There is no bloat in my belly, and I've already noticed a significant change in my appearance. No photos yet though. I'm saving those for the two week mark. That's when I will now for sure that the carbs are complete out of my system and all my glycogen stores are gone. It should take less time then that, but I want to make sure. After those two weeks, I remain full on low fat keto for another 16 days at the minimum. I may have a small garbage snack at the end, but not much more than that. No full cheat meal or day. I had a fill of those during the carb cycling.

    Oh, I just realize I took a picture of the pepper I just ate and you can really see the variegation on it. This is a closer look at the pepper on the left side. That's the one I ate.


     It's so cool looking. I think that is it for me today. I'll be back on Sunday with more news. I don't expect the next two days to go smoothly, since we will be relegated to stay inside because of the weather. There is usually a small amount to outside time that breaks up the day for my mom, but rainy weather will keep that from happening. It will more than likely spawn more imaginary friends. Oh, she did lose one of them and fired the rest, but somehow they came back. It's really weird in the house right now. Peace in and goodnight.

Tuesday, April 21, 2020

Despite It All, Today Wasn't So Bad

     Alright, let's get this going. The last couple of days have been extremely hard. My moms dementia has hit new levels, with her talking to imaginary people constantly, and even arguing with them quite often. I'm talking full blown yelling matches. It's truly maddening, and yesterday I was at my wits end. There was also the fact that she kept waking up, so I didn't sleep well at all. this is also on top of me doing a 36 hour fast, so I was wound tight like a tether. I managed to get through it, and today was a little better, but the conversation are grating. She does this weird whisper talking for the most of it, and it may be one of the most annoying sounds ever. Yesterday I simply went out into the garage at one point and worked on those can stands. It was the most relaxing part of my day. I didn't get the chance to work on them today, but I managed to get ahead of schedule with them, so if I work on them tomorrow with the same vigor, I should get back ahead of the game.

     The plan for tomorrow is to cut them apart. I did all the drilling and shaping work while it was as one board. That made it easier to manipulate and hold in place. That also decreased the time spent to about a third of what it took last time. So like I said, I have to cut them apart, sand them down lightly, then do the routing, and then do a finishing sanding on them. Then it is all about assembly. If I can assemble them tomorrow. I will only have to stain and polyurethane them, and then I'm done. I will contact the buyer and we will figure out how he is going to get the money to me, so I can send these out. I did them slightly different other than keeping it all together until I cut. I drilled the dowel rod holes all the way through. There was a reason for this. It gives them more stability, and I had this really cool knot hole in one that was sitting right were a dowel rod hole needed to be. I had to drill that hole from the bottom up, and hopefully nail the position. I think I did.


     It's the middle stand. You will notice the knot hole first, and then if you look closely, you will see the rod hole right next to it. I'm pretty thrilled with how these are coming out. The first ones I did, were technically all test pieces, and I didn't really care about perfection, but these have to be done right, since someone is actually paying for them. I'm toying with the idea of glueing a rubberized mat to the bottom of them, but I'm not sure. It's really not necessary, since the ones I have, don't slide around on any surface. If everything goes right, these will be done on Friday.

     I had to go against my normal routine today, but it was for a good reason. I had to make a third and fourth trip out this week. It was my mom's doctors appointment. She was once again in great health, despite the fact that she lost another 5 lbs due to not eating. That is another struggle I didn't mention above. She did it everything today though, which was kind of shocking. She is usually trying to feed the imaginary people next to her. Don't get me started on that. I also had to go out and get her prescriptions once they were filled. I did notice more people wearing masks which was a great sign of people doing what they are supposed to do, to get rid of this virus.

     Let's get to the fast. It went well, I woke up this morning feeling amazing. I did my waist measurement to see if there was a difference in carb vs. keto waist. There was, and it was rather dramatic. There was an inch and a half difference in the circumference around my waist at the bellybutton. If that doesn't tell you that carbs are useless, then I don't know what does. Ok, maybe useless is a bit over the top, but you can see that going high carb has a major result on your body. I'm still a half inch above my lowest measurement and I'm hoping to be back down to that in two weeks. I will measure again on Friday morning to see how things are going, and if they are heading in the right direction. I'm sure they will be. Todays feedings were outstanding, and I made my favorite meal for dinner, with a twist. I made cheeseburgers, with bacon wrapped asparagus. Now the twist isn't that twisty. I have put peppers on my cheeseburgers before, but this is the first time I got to put a scotch bonnet on them, and it was pretty freaking good. I do so love the taste and heat of a scotch bonnet, and on a burger with some aged sharp cheddar and diced tomatoes, was out of this world good. Yeah I was lacking a good amount of greens, but this was a refeed day. I'll get the greens in bigtime tomorrow. Here is my favorite meal.


     Yes, that was the bulk of my calories for the day, but that is 900 calories and only 5 carbs. The asparagus will help out my gut bacteria, which technically you shouldn't eat coming right off a fast, because it enhances the strongest of the gut bacteria (good bacteria or bad, which ever there is more of), but I already know that my gut bacteria is outstanding, so I'm all good. Plus, everything I did earlier in the day was to promote the good gut bacteria. Yeah, I had a few peppers in the middle of the day, and just a little while ago. Did I ever mention that peppers promote a strong stomach lining and put the good gut bacteria? Yeah, peppers are a powerhouse.

     Ok, I'm going to leave you with my Favorite Thing of the Week. Now this video is one you have probably seen, but I'm almost sure you've never seen it like this. My buddy and me got in a conversation and as a twist on what I said, I sent the double rainbow guy video to him. He responded by saying to watch it at half speed. I did not let me down at all, and that is why it's my Favorite thing of the week. So, when you watch this video, go to the little gear icon in the lower right corner and change the playback speed, to 0.5. You will not regret it. Let's face it, right now, we need things like this little fun video that is enhanced by slowing it down.



     I'm out of here. Remember to stay safe, stay home, and peace in and goodnight.

Sunday, April 19, 2020

Self Care Starts With Yourself


     I just wanted to start with that picture of the first bloom on my Kew Blue, cause I got a rant coming tonight. This is such a beautiful flower, and there are 5 other buds growing right now. Remember, when you plant a garden, make sure it is diverse. It's just beneficial to the prosperity of your garden.

     Before I get into the whole carb cycling thing and the picture I took just before writing this. I need to talk about physical distancing practices, and how to properly wear a mask. I had to run some errands today. I would normally do it first thing in the morning when things first open (less people), but I had to wait for someone that was coming over to visit (at a distance) with my mom. That put me heading out after noon. My first stop was Target, and they managed to make things worse for physical distancing measures. They only left one of the entrances open, which is fine, but then they just let everyone run amok. My grocery store has put up oneway arrows for each aisle so that people won't pass each other going separate ways, not at Target. Now with this new found protest of personal freedoms, (seriously, fuck those people {sorry had to use the language, but that will be the only time}) people are now bringing their whole families, and not observing the 6 foot rule. I stayed calm despite the fact that I just wanted to scream. Let's talk about masks now.


     This was me today. I wash my hands, and then put that mask on at home, and it doesn't come off until I return home and wash my hands again. The mask is then disinfected and hung up. I have 3 masks (gave one to my nephew), so I have a rotation. That one won't be worn again until I've worn the other two. I saw people throughout the store, taking there mask off and having it rest on their neck and then putting it back on again. If you are going to do that, don't even bother wearing a mask. You just ruined every reason you are wearing it. Let me briefly go into the sunglasses thing. My hands are clean in my car, until I walk through the doors of the building. I put my sunglasses up right before walking in, and they stay up until I'm back in my car and I can clean my hands. Only after my hands are clean, do I put the sunglasses down again. Touching your sunglasses with potentially infected hands, is a real good way to infect you with the virus. Last thing about physical distancing. If you see someone coming the other way, and they are wearing a mask, don't assume that you are kindred sprits and can come real close to each other. Stay away from me. I will let you go buy as I stand as far to the side as possible, that doesn't mean you should walk down the middle of the freaking aisle. Keep your distance.

     The last thing is what happened at Lowe's and as bad as Target was, Lowe's was worse. There were so many people there, and I felt like I was running a gauntlet trying to stay away from people. It was insane, and I'm glad I don't have to go back for some time. I had to go there to pick up some dowel rods for a project I'm doing. Someone saw my can stands and wants me to make them some. I had the 2x4, but I was out of the rods, so I had to venture in, if I wanted to get this done, and it' going to be worth my time. I gave the person a price, that I honestly though was really high, but my buddy and his wife were telling me that I was underselling myself. I figured on a price, and expected the person to tell me to shove it, or at the very least, try to talk me down. I had planned for that, I had a bottom price, which I still thought was really high, but I had to take a shot at it. They went for the first price, like they were expecting it to be double what I was asking. It's pretty insane, so I'm going to be making can stands this week.

     Ok, now for the carb cycling. My true feelings on this whole way of eating is, that I don't like it much. It isn't for me. I did enjoy a few things about it, but overall it wasn't a good fit. I do think that the final results aren't truly in yet, and they make take a week or two to see what the real effect of carb cycling is for me. Since today was the final day of it, I went a little crazy and just had one of those good ol' fashioned garbage days. That let to bloat city after each meal, but it was worth it for a one time event. Other than a few sugary treats, I ate very clean with very low fat. My fat intake was probably more normal carb intake which is around 5% of my calories. This will be I guess my before photo, which is the final day photo of carb cycling. You can see a noticeable difference in my body from my last set of photos. My body fat stayed the same, but my waist to height ratio was destroyed. Once again, mostly due to stomach bloat. My weight fluctuated greatly, but my final weigh in was at 152.2 which is a 4 pound gain from the start date. If I had to guess my current weight as I sit here which is right after my dinner. I would put it at around the 155 mark. My normal jump during a keto day, is only 2 pounds tops. It's hard to believe, but it's true. Other than my physical appearance, and I'll get to the photo in just a second, was bathroom time. I had some minor constipation, which is supposed to be the case when you take in more carbs and fiber, which I did, by having grains, which I don't eat at all on keto. Regularity was shot completely, which once again is not supposed to happen. Like I said, this way of eating is clearly not for me, but I needed to do this to see what it would do to me. Ok, now for the photo. You can see that I'm quite a bit softer, and puffy from my other photos, and I'll put one of those up after, for comparison. I'm sure the will all go away with in this first week back on keto. I will be starting a 36 hour fast this evening. I'll get to the details on that after the photos.


     That was after carb cycling, and this was the last photo after the low fat keto.


     I'm going to do a two week update with photos for what the results after the carb cycling, so look forward to that, but I'm all in on another 30 days of the low fat keto, which will probably be much longer. Now for the 36 hour fast. The reason I feel safe going over the 20 hour mark during this pandemic, is the I will not have to go anywhere except for the grocery store, which will be around the 12 hour mark, so my immune system will not be compromised. This 36 will be a quick bounce back into ketosis. This isn't a quick fix to undo what I did with the carbs, this is just a bounce back in. The whole 30 days is the fix for the carbs, which as I said will probably be much longer than the 30 days. What that means, is that I'll be strict for a minimum of 30 days. Discipline is the only way to get things done properly. Oh yeah, I can say that the shorts I'm wearing are size small. I never thought I would ever fit in a small again. The lesson learned from all of this is, that even if you fall of the wagon, (which I didn't, but keto speaking I did) if you do it with control, you will not destroy all your hard work. Even with the stomach bloat, I didn't have to size up on my cloths. Oh yeah, one last thing before I end the carb discussion. I do believe that all the weight gain is water weight. I will know for sure in a couple of days. Most of the water weight will go away with the fast, but it will take burning of all my glycogen stores before all the water weight is gone. That will take about a week, maybe a little less, depending on my workouts. I am so looking forward to eating my way again.

     I don't tell anyone when my birthday is, because I don't celebrate, and don't try to figure it out when I say that this is my birthday month. Even though I don't celebrate, I do treat myself a little during this month. This is one of the things I treated myself to.


     This shirt serves a dual purpose. It is a replica of the athletic shirt form Star Trek Discovery, which is my new favorite show, so the DISCO stands for a shortened version of Discovery, but it also says DISCO, which is one of the greatest genres of music ever. When I saw that shirt on the show, I had to see if they made it, and they do, so I got it. My other splurge on myself won't be here for a whiles nd probably not until next month. I found a woman that sells fiber optic LED masks that light up and change colors, so I had to have one of those. It was a little pricy, but I felt I was worth it for a change. I will post a video when I get it, since I believe that masks are going to be a common everyday thing from now on. I like the idea of us being more like Japan when it comes to disease transferal prevention. I'm actually all for wearing masks at all times, but I know that won't happen.

     I got one last picture for you. I ddi go rock star like the old days with my guyliner today. I had that throwback feeling today and went with it. I may go back to this look a little more often than the subtle look I've been doing when I get the rare chance to go out.

   
     Oh, and no I don't care about what you think of how I look. On a side note, that shirt is small as well, and it fits loose on me. How awesome is that? This new but old look on me, is all part of self improvement, and the most important thing about self care and self improvement is not caring what others think of you. If you like it, that's great, if you don't that's great to, but know that I don't care one way or the other how you think of me. It's how I think about myself that matters. Peace in and goodnight.

Thursday, April 16, 2020

Carbs Suck

     I only have a few more days of the carb cycling that I've been doing. Things have finally started to balance out this week, but the doesn't mean I enjoy this way of eating. I don't feel as bad on the carb days, but there is a noticeable difference. I have a bloated feeling after just about every meal. I retain much more water because of the carbs, so my weight is out of balance. Last weigh in had me up 4 pounds since I started, which more than likely is water weight, since my calipers are saying i'm staying solid at that 15% body fat mark. On my keto days, I feel phenomenal. I wake up with more energy (that could be the carbs burning off). I don't have the bloated feeling at all during the day, and I'm just more relaxed in general. I have noticed no differences what so ever in my workouts. Carb workout vs non carb workouts are the same. I was expecting a boost in my carb workouts, but it didn't happen. Here is the schedule I've been on. 2 days of carbs to load up, and then one keto day. I keep the carbs pretty clean, but have allowed a small amount of sugar, and some high glycemic fruit, (oranges). I did miss oranges. I have found that rice doesn't really affect me that much, and could be a nice occasionally addition to mealtime. The oranges will disappear though. They don't seem to cause any ill affect, it's just that their glycemic load is way to high for my needs. Maybe once a month, might be good, but no more than that.

     Here are the major things I've learned from all of this. I don't have to fear carbs. I didn't really, but I kept a very safe distance from them. I ate for a month, what would be called "off the keto rails" and it didn't really kill me. When I had a carb day, I was not fully satiated. I was eating every 2 to 3 hours, which kept that bloated feeling going most of the day. Keto days I had no problem, and even had to push myself to eat 3 times. I would mostly wait until later in the morning to eat, and then have dinner a few hours later, and was good for the whole day. On average, I would eat fewer calories on keto days, and feel much more satiated. I slept better on keto days, and rose earlier the next morning. Although workouts weren't affected, my overall energy level was higher on keto days. Once again this could have been the glucose burn off.

     I will weigh in tomorrow for my final weigh in of this cycle even though it's a couple days early. I will take pictures with Saturday or Sunday and have them for you on the Sunday post. My last mean on Sunday will set up me going back to my low fat Mediterranean keto way of eating, and will begin a 36 hour fast to kick it back in to gear. I'm sure that I won't know the full affect of carb cycling until a couple of weeks from now. This could boost fat loss into high gear when I go back to full keto. In that case it will be completely worth it. It will still be worth it on an experimental level, and in knowing what my body needs most. That really is the most important part of this.

     While in quarantine, I have been watching a ton of Netflix, and I finally sat down and began watching Queer Eye. I used to enjoy the original one, but it got kind of boring and formulaic, and one I found out that all the guys weren't gay, it really ruined it for me. This new series on Netflix, is different. They aren't just dressing up a straight guy so that he can win over his date, but they are actually changing lives, and they don't stick to just guys. I'm not sure how many episodes I've watched, but there have been both men, and women as well as gay people getting the make overs. They have a guy Koramo, who really delves into their psyche and helps them become the person they've always wanted to be. The make over the home they are in, or in 2 cases so far, a business. They teach them how to make healthier meals, how to dress, and then the best is the appearance make over. That is headed up by Johnathan Van Ness. He is hands down, the best part of the show. He is so unapologetically him, and that is such a spectacular thing. I'm not going to describe his appearance, although you've probably already seen him in commercials and other cameo appearances on shows. His appearance is what pulls you in, but it's his personality that really takes you to new depths. He is genuinely a kind person, and you can see it when he is with each person that they are making over. You have to imagine that he hasn't had the easiest of lives, and to stand above all that and have the positive outlook that he has is nothing short of amazing. I highly recommend giving this show a chance. They have two series on Netflix. Queer Eye More than a Makeover, and Queer Eye We're in Japan. I'm on about the 10th episode on Makeover, and I really enjoy watching it. You really begin feeling for each person that is getting the makeover, and you start rooting for their success and growth. My sister told me today, that she is going to send them to my house for me to get made over, and that would be a dream come true for me. I told her that if the Fab Five showed up at my house, I would have to tell them how much I love all of them, but that me and Johnathan were going to be really good friends. He just seems like the type of person that you really want as a friend. I'm lucky to have a few people like that in my life. I have room for one more for sure.

     Ok, one picture from the garden, and them I'm out of here. I finally got a ripe El Rito pepper today, and picked it. I also ate it and was shocked by it. It's supposed to be medium heat, which had me a bit worried since the last one I had that was supposed to be mild to medium heat, ended up being way hotter, and surprised me. This pepper is on the larger size as well, so I couldn't just cram the whole thing in my mouth, I had to do it in two bites, which just prolongs the pain. I bit into and there was no heat what so ever, but there was this wonderful cherry tartness to it. It was super sweet with that cherry flavor and it was really good. That was the bottom half, maybe all the heat was up in the placenta. It was, but the heat was so mild that a Poblano is hotter than it. I don't know if this is just a dude pod heat wise or they got the description way wrong. I have a few more ripening on the plant, so I can see if they are all like that. If they are all mild, then I'm going to try one of them in some vanilla ice cream. Keto ice cream that is. I think it would be really good in ice cream. That was the first thing I thought of when I ate it. It would be like having cherry vanilla ice cream, but with a mega dose of vitamin C and magnesium. That is a bonus to me. I can't wait to try it out. I guess I should get to the picture.


     Alright, I'm out. Peace in and goodnight.
   

Tuesday, April 14, 2020

Big Bird

     Ok, let's get Favorite Song of the Week out of the way first, and then we are going to talk about Big Bird. Yeah, you read that right, we are going to have a little discussion about Big Bird. Now, for Favorite Song of the Week. This is from one of my all time favorites, and I was so stoked when I saw a post about it the day before it came out. This band loves to do unannounced releases, and this was one of them. From Twenty One Pilots comes their newest song, "Level of Concern".



     As you can see, the video featured Tyler's wife Jenna and their newborn and Josh's wife Debbie Ryan. You may know her if you had a kid that watched the Disney Channel a couple years ago. She was in a show called Jessie. Anyway, this song came out at a time that I really needed a boost. These past few weeks have been exceedingly difficult with my mom. She has gone over the edge, and I believe she is starting to show signs of a multiple personality disorder. The talking to herself has gotten more intense to the point that she is having complete back and forth conversations, and often refers to herself as a different person. Sometimes she is the little girl that she is always trying to feed, while other times she is a younger adult woman, and other times she is an older lady. It's hard to figure out which one I'm talking to until she sort of reveals who she is. When I get it wrong a lot she begins screaming and yelling about how these people that work here don't care about her. I won't even get into what went on today. We were talking about the song. Anyway, this song being released when it was, was exactly what I needed to put a smile on my face, even if it was for a little while.

     Now for that Big Bird Discussion. I was watching one of the morning network news shows this morning, when the brought Big Bird on for an interview. This was another one of those things that just made me smile, and it reminded me of what a special character Big Bird always has been. He is the epitome of the gentle giant. I large bird that should strike fear into those who see it, but you end up smiling and feeling happy instead. Big Bird always looks to the positive not just in life, but in people as well. Think about it, his neighbor is Oscar the grouch, and he always has a hearty hello and a kind word for Oscar despite Oscar being his namesake. He was this way in the interview as well. Big Bird is truly the best of us, and what we should all strive to be. I know that sounds crazy, but stick with me on this. While we are in quarantine, we are clearly missing people, and we are trying to find new ways to interact in any way possible. Some are being creative and posting videos of doing different things like dancing or singing. All of this is in an effort to have some kind, even if it is through a random comment, relationship with people. When this is all over we will have a choice to make. Do we go back to normal, which let's face it, it wasn't all that great or, do we strive for something better? This is where we can learn from Big Bird. If we take on just a fraction of his personality and positivity towards other people we can have a better world. For example; when you see a person as you walk through a doorway, offer a smile and say hello. When you see someone running towards a door that you are going through, stop and hold it for them. Make your interactions count, and make them positive. I've seen a ton of videos talking about how smiles are infectious. Let's take that to the next level, and with that smile, add some true kindness as well. Normal sucked, and it was full of hatred, bigotry, racism, an so much more. Yeah there was good and kindness in the world, but it was enveloped by all those other things. Let's flip that on its head and make kindness that envelope, and let's make it smother all that bad stuff. Yes, I know this idealistic speech that may never come true, but aren't dreams made for trying to make them come true? Here is what I vow. From this day forward, I will try my best not only to be a better person, but show more kindness to this world and the inhabitants of it. I hope that you will do the same. This whole mantra of "We are all in this together", doesn't have to end when you can ago back outside. Let's make a better world. One that is full of joy, music, creativity, and kindness.

     I could talk about more of what is going on in my life, but instead I'm just going to leave you with a picture of my random wood pile and what I found in it today. It's a photograph that speaks volumes about what I just wrote above. Peace in and goodnight.


Sunday, April 12, 2020

Just Help Out A Little

     Ok, I have a lot to talk about tonight, and I just want to get this out of the way first. I mentioned last week that a friend was making masks and selling them, and I even shared a picture of the masks that were made for me. She doesn't have a shop, but if you have Facebook, you can check her out at this link Awesome Masks She is selling them 3 for $25 or 1 for $10. Trust me that is a great price for a quality mask. She will make them somewhat to what you want, depending on what material she has. She will give you a choice (first come first serve) to get the material of your choosing, and she will even customize it for a filter sleeve or a wire for better squeeze around the nose. There will be added costs for that, but you can discuss that with her. I can tell you, that the masks fit great, so I see no need for the extra wire. That may just be a little overkill. Thats up to you though. She is making them and sending them out as fast as she can, so be a little patient with her. It is only herself doing these masks. so it takes a little extra time than if you just ordered some crappy ones off of Amazon.

     Ok, there's my sales pitch for you to get an extra awesome mask. Now it's on to the postal service. The American postal service is under attack, and is being threatened to be left out of all the bailouts. This will leave the USPS belly up sometimes during the summer. I don't know about you, but I love the fact that I can send a letter for $.50 although across the country in a couple of days. The USPS is one of the largest employers of veterans in the country, and they will all be without a job, and you won't get your mail on time. How about that Amazon package you ordered? It will not be there in two days, and you may just have to go pick it up at one of the other parcel services offices, since they don't always do final mile delivery.  They usually pass that off to the USPS. See where this is going. The goal of those that are doing this, is to privatize the postal service. When that happens that 50 cent stamp will be something of the past. Get ready for $3.00 letter delivery. Here is what you can do directly to help out, and it's real simple, and something you probably need anyway. Go to usps.com and buy a sleeve of stamps. They have a large assortment of stamps to choose from. I pre-ordered the Earth Day stamps. You need stamps anyway, why not buy them direct from the source to help fund them to keep them going through this pandemic. It's simple, something you need, and a great way that you can directly help a veteran.

     Second rant out of the way. Although, those really weren't rants as much as PSA's. Here is a rant. For the past few weeks, I've been doing something called Carb Cycling. It's supposed to be a really good way to lean up even more than what I've been doing. What you do, is eat higher in carbs for a couple of days, then have a low carb day. On the carb days, you go low fat, and on the non carb days you eat Keto. I can tell you that I do not like it, and I'm glad that I only have 1 more week of doing it. My weight is holding steady, but fluctuating a bit more than normal. My normal weight fluctuation is between 2-3 lbs, where as now, I'm fluctuating from 4-5 lbs. I also have carb bloat that has changed my waist measurement by a full 2 inches. That is a lot. The uncomfortable of the bloat, and the retention of water is just not in what I want to do. I will be going back to my low fat Mediterranean Keto eating as soon as this is all over. It may be, that the after effect is what this is all about, and I'll let you know what happens, but this discomfort is not worth it for whatever the end result is. I try these things out, so I can tell you about them. This is definitely not for me, but it may work out for you. Oh, and when I say higher carbs, it's not like I'm eating the way I used to. I'm only jumping up to around 150-200 grams of carbs on the high carb days. that is a far share lower than the 400-500 grams I used to eat. I have enjoyed having rice again, but once again, it's not worth the bloat. One cup of rice equals bloat city, and I can say with a matter of fact now, that what I used to say was that full feeling is simply bloat. When I eat that low fat Mediterranean Keto I can eat twice as much food at a meal, and not have any bloat at all. My stomach is still flat as can be. That truly tells me everything I need to now about what carbs do to my body. It's not a good thing.

      It's garden time, and I got pictures. The first is of the tiniest sunflower ever. I can't confirm that is true, but I'm going with it. This is another Chocolate Cherry, and I'm quite shocked that it's alive much less that it bloomed. It has been through the mill, but it has survived. Here it is.


     Even though it's tiny as can be, it's still pretty awesome. The next is the Aji Ayuyo. It is finally beginning to ripen, and I just wanted to show you how cool peppers can be. It starts off a deep purple, when the flower drops, then it grows and gets that cream colored section, that is on that one to the right. It then begins turning orange and then finally finishing off at red. This is right in the middle of the process, and it's still not red today. This was taken a day or two ago.


     They are great looking pods, and I'm really looking forward to tasting them. I plan on picking a ripe one and one that is still purple, so that I can see exactly what the difference flavor and heat wise. It's going to be a fun little experiment. I don't think these are supposed to be all that hot, so it should be an easy pepper eating day for me.

     I don't remember if shared this flower with you. This is a random one that popped up in a window box, and I had no idea what it was. My buddy finally found the answer it is called a Torenia. I made the decision to take care of it, and it has thrived, and recently has exploded with blooms. It's a real pretty flower, and I'm glad that I lucked into it.


     Ok, maybe I didn't have that much to talk about, but I have plan for something to talk about on Tuesday, and don't forget I got my Favorite Song of the Week already picked out. Stay safe, and stay home everybody. Peace in and goodnight.

Thursday, April 9, 2020

Despite Everything Being Wrong, You Can Have A Good Day

     Ok, I need to start with a gripe tonight, and it's only because this is the only way to get this out of my system. My mom's newest thing is to come out of her room and immediate start saying that she hasn't had anything to eat for days, and that she wants food. I have taken slight advantage of this by giving her food when she wants it, but the problem with that, is that she only picks at it, takes a couple of bites and then says she full, or that it's gross and she doesn't like it. If I ask her about it, she will say that she wasn't hungry, it was the other girl, and that it's her that doesn't like it. Thats when I have to take the food back out and start all over again. A few times I was able to just bring the same stuff back out. When it's a snack type item I can get away with that, but if it's something that breaks down after an hour, it's a no go, so I feel like we are wasting more food, and I don't like that at all. When it is just after she ate, I will tell her that the kitchen is closed until, insert which ever meal is next. That usually leads to a tantrum, that I pretty much just let her throw. I have no idea how to get her out of that. She usually settles down by the time she goes back to her room and then come out ten minutes later saying that she is hungry again. It's frustrating to say the least, but I'm dealing with it.

    I already have my Favorite Song of the Week for next week. It came out today, and it lifted me up like you wouldn't believe. No, I'm not telling you what it is, you'll just have to wait until Tuesday. With that new song coming out today, nothing can really get me down. Sometimes you just have to let the little things carry you, and that's what I did today.

     I gotta share my dinner with you tonight. I had a steak with brussel  sprouts and tomatoes, but I cooked the steak a little different, and it came out perfect. I'm talking melt in your mouth like butter perfect.



     Ok, here's what I did. I seasoned the steak with salt and pepper. Before all that, I sat some butter out for a few hours, letting it soften up, then I mixed in some fresh pressed garlic. I heated up a skillet to high heat and right before I put the steak on to cook. I spread the garlic butter on the heat side down. It seared it to perfection in 5 minutes. I spread the garlic butter on the top side, and flipped it for another 5 minutes. The scent was divine, with that fresh garlic heating up on that steak. I took it off and then let it sit for another 5 minutes, while the brussel sprouts roasted in the oven. It was perfectly pink inside, and like I said, melted in your mouth. I highly recommend taking the time to cook a steak this way. It was incredible. If you doubt the pinkness. I have proof.



     It was so good.

     I can hear my mom starting to walk out her again, which means I'm going to get the "We need food". Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you that she speaks of herself in the plural sense now. She is talking about the girls that are with her at all times, except for when they disappear on her and she starts yelling for them asking where they are at. It's a very odd time here in the house, and the quarantine only makes it worse.

     Here is the end of the conversation that we just had. "I'm hungry. I'm hungry too. I can't believe this place, the hell with that. I'm going to tell those people what this place is doing, by starving us. Me too." Then she wandered off out of earshot. I can only har mumbling as she goes back other room. Let me tell you again, how I hope that you never have to deal with anything like this. I truly believe that it is sugar and alcohol that is a big contributor in this disease, so do what you can to limit your consumption of these two items, so that it doesn't happen to you. That's my soapbox rant, which wan't really a rant, more of a cautionary tale.

     I got to garden photos. The first one is the worlds smallest sunflower. I don't even know how this one bloomed, but it did. It was a random stem that is half laying on the ground and the other half going straight up. It is maybe 6 inches tall at the most, but it managed to bloom, so here you go, the worlds smallest sunflower.

    
     I do like the look of the chocolate cherry, but I'm disappointed in how they have grown so far, but it's probably my fault. I can't be lucky with everything.

    The second photo is of the Aji Ayuyo peppers. I have a couple of them that are ripening, and it's impressive as they go through the color change, from purple cream, to full red.


     When that one ripens, I'm going to pull it, and one of the purple ones, just to see what the differences are. A lot of peppers that go through multiple color changes have different heat levels and flavors at each turn, so it will be fun to see what if any difference there are. Its a cool looking pepper to. They are about the size of an almond, so not real big. I can't remember what the heat level is, but I think it's medium heat, somewhere around a cayenne pepper. I'll let you know. Oh, I'm going to be picking a few peppers tomorrow. The Buena Muluta ( Me and my buddy thinks it's just a cayenne) has about 6 ripe pods on it. I have two Bulgarian carrots, a couple of Jimez Pueblos, and those Rainforest, which I'm really looking forward to. There are still a few more different peppers that are ripening up. The El Rito is taking forever, but two more pods have started the change. I do have a Scotch Bonnet that is ripe, but I'm going to wait until a few more ripen up. I'm waiting on the Colorado, which has a dozen pods on it. Oh, I forgot, I have two small Fish peppers that are ripe. I've been waiting for that one too. It's supposed to be pretty good. These are so small though. Anyway, I got a lot of peppers to try over the weekend.

     Ok, I'm going to finish watching SWAT, which I recorded the other night, then maybe get in another episode of ST Discovery in. Peace in and goodnight.